Just ignore my sense of doom
yes, I can't help it...
I am Irish.
I am Catholic.
I see death and destruction all around me.
I am not Little Miss Sunshine (A movie I loved by the way.... what did people expect the heroin snorting grandpa obsessed with sex to teach his grand daughter... that is all I will say)
That being said, I am not being positive about my first mammogram which will be tomorrow. Mammogram and the Angel's 12th birthday... it seems like worlds are colliding to me...
Oh don't get statistical on me... I know I am a walking time bomb when it comes to breast cancer... I am fat, I drink, I love meat, there is breast cancer on both sides of my family... as my cousin, pointed out to me, I have "excess adipose tissue"... or wait... that is the same as me being fat.
Mostly I think it is the Angel stuff that is getting to me... Lately, she is a soul sucking force in my life... I guess I view the appointment date as a sign...
So... here is my huge paranoid fantasy...
Diagnosed with breast cancer...
Lose both boobs,
Now that cancer deaths are on the decline, chemo and radiation will come to naught... (Oh when I mentioned all of this to Fun Daddy, he declared that dying of cancer in the face of decreased cancer deaths would be ironic.... and not the Alanis Morrisette version of it.. since that song should have been called, Isn't it a bummer.)
The Angel calls me a nasty name on my deathbed,
Imelda complains that I am not doing her homework for her therefore I am not supportive of her schooling..
and as a final blow... Fun Daddy turns mes filles over to his parents to be raised where they become my mother in laws personal bartenders and another "stupid female" foil for my father in law...
Now that I have confessed this fear, it means that it can't happen, right?
And yes, Jim, I am ok... I am just highly paranoid. I will be fine after my birthday... yes, it will take that long.
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3 comments:
OMG, you need to turn 40 already. Jesus. Or is it 41? I have had a few friends who had breast reduction. Their backs feel so much better now.
Don't worry about the kids - I'll grab 'em before they get anywhere near either set of grandparents! :)
And only 2 more weeks until they go to Colorado - have you booked your week long vacation in a luxury hotel or a resort spa yet? Sans spouse, dog, cat, kids, etc.....
Hope everything went well. You should definately do a spa retreat, makes all the difference.
Remind the filles that your friend Jim is well connected and can get them into a treatment program at the drop of a hat...and one that is not really comfortable.
My parents used to threaten me with Fr Bakers, of course with the way I turned out not sure you want to mirror this parenting approach
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