Doing two things at once

It is 7:15am. And I am like someone who has come out of coma.

Why?

Because at 2:10am or so I was woken up by Fun Daddy asking, “What was that?” Despite the obvious, “How the fuck should I know,” response that was unable to form on my lips because those lips were thick with somnolence. I think all I managed to get out was, “whaa?”

And there was a weird sound. Like someone was drilling a really thick piece of wood. It couldn’t be heard from the bathroom window. Just on the smurfy side of the house. So Fun Daddy decided to listen on. As I drifted back to sleep… he woke me up again. Why? Because I was snoring.

I do that sometimes.

Like during allergy season.

Which is going on right now.

So for the rest of the night I tried to keep my ears open and listen for the sounds of my own stertorous breathing. Why? I have no freaking idea. It seemed a good idea at the time. But, the problem is that it is impossible to sleep and listen at the same time. So naturally, I accomplished neither.

And I am exhausted as a result.

Blech