Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Just what I deserve

MonAnge and Imelda go to Catholic school. This I think that you all knew.

But, they also get up at the crack of dawn on Tuesdays to attend a special kind of extracurricular activity. They go to school at 6:45 am for something called Mass Crew. Yes, mes filles get up in the whee hours of the morning to attend mass, adoration, bible talk and breakfast. I know. It is hard to believe that they are my children, isn't it?

This morning as I was driving them to Crew, I was thinking about MonAnge and her endless list of complaints. Her phantom stomach ailment (stress and NOT EATING), grade issues... and I remembered something that my mother used to tell me. And considering where I was driving les filles, I thought I had found a receptive audience.

"Listen girlies," I said to them. "It is going to be a long day and MonAnge? You and particular have been having problems. Now I want you to remember that no matter how much you think y ou are suffering, Jesus suffered more on the cross. So when you are feeling crappy or picked on, take those feelings and offer them to God as a sacrifice."

What a good Catholic mom I am, right?

Instead I got, "Jesus MOM! Since when do you care about religion?"

And she is right. I have no faith. It disappeared years ago. I am going through the motions hoping that the girls have something to help them. And it seems to be working. But for me? Damned if I do. Damned if I don't.

Now of course, I feel compelled to taunt them. I haven't decided which direction to go. Which do you think is the better choice?

The Power of Christ compells you to do your math!
Stay out of the fucking cupcakes bitches!

1 comment:

Chicka said...


I'll tell the girls "Do you think that makes Jesus mad when you do those things?" And they say, "Mom, YOU don't BELIEVE in Jesus." My response is always, "No, but YOU do." *snerk*

The best was when I took Bug to church. She had a rather tough time sitting still and paying attention, and really was rather disobedient. So I marched her out of there, telling her that I won't have to punish her, because Jesus will.

As we walked out, she walked SMACK into the doorframe and gashed her face a little.

Coincidence? I think not. *double snerk*