What Does This Picture Say?

Yes, this is a dryer. My dryer.

What does this picture tell you?

Clothes are dried and someone has picked out the stuff they need and left the rest.

To me, that says, "This is mine. Clean up after me or wait until I decide I am done with it".

I find my dryer in this condition at least 4 days a week. Additionally, there are clothes on the floor of the laundry room (closet) and the lint trappings are on the floor as well, even though there is a garbage can.

Oh, and the caps are off the laundry detergents because

That is it. Just because.

I have asked that everyone in the house empty the washer and dryer when they are done and stop using it like a dresser.

This is the response I get.

Don't ask me why I am angry with you all the time. Your actions speak louder than your words. This is your world, and I am an annoyance. I get it.

Happy 4th!

I know. I have been a pitiful blogger lately...

Let's just say, stuff is crazy busy around here... and unemployment sucks.

Also teenagers on summer vacay.. stink too.

But Muppets? They make me smile. And I do the Swedish Chef. and Beaker.

So if my favorite Texas Super Hero Princesses are watching? Have a good 4th of July in Norway, girlies! Hopefully you will have some fireworks!

Household arithmetic

What happens when you add one toilet, a bunch of cotton balls, too much toilet paper, any paper towels, cotton swabs, assorted wrappers that could and should have been put into the garbage can and ladies unmentionable supplies?

If you say water leaking from the toilet, through the bathroom floor and into my living room, you would be right!

I am not going to out the girl who did it. Suffice it to say, she has be presented with a bill for $400.00 and she is complaining incessantly about how we ruin her life.

I amthisclosetocompletelyabandoningmylentenvowofsobriety.


In fact. I am going to drink Vodka right now. Fuck it.

Oh No She Di'Int!

Fun Daddy, Imelda and I went to dinner last night. Lillith was invited but claimed that she had too much of a stomach ache. What-ever... Fine stay home, we said. We went and had a lovely time.

This morning I was looking where Lillith was sitting last night when we got home. Right next to that spot? Her cellphone.

Now, she didn't put it there. That was Fun Daddy's responsibility. (He really isn't good at this grounding thing, is he?) But still, she should have left it alone.

I turned on the phone and held my breath.

I checked the text messages. They were clear. Hmmm.... ok. maybe she left the phone alone.

But then I checked the call listings. Calls came both in and out of the phone while we were gone.

Sigh.

Does she really think that we are THAT stupid? Apparently so.

Fun Daddy and I argued discussed what to do. He wanted to extend her grounding one day. I wanted to extend it one week. Luckily we headed off to marriage counseling before we had to decide. In the end, we compromised. The grounding lasts an additional four days. But if she can keep herself from grousing or wheedling until Friday night, we will shave two days off the grounding and she can have the phone back Saturday morning. However, for every episode of complaint or begging adds an additional day.

Naturally, she wants nothing to do with the compromise. But the rules are established and she is responsible for them either way.

The rest is up to her.

Grounded means you stay home.

Lillith is grounded.

Why? Well, first she told me to fuck off.

And then Fun Daddy said she could go to Drina's but she couldn't set her own schedule like she is used to doing. Instead, we would drop her off at 1:30, go run errands, and then pick her up at 4:00. Personally, I was against this, as I had already been told to fuck off, but even THIS concession was unacceptable to Lillith. Finally, she acceded and we left.

At 3:45, as we were about 10 minutes from Drina's house, Fun Daddy called Lillith to tell her that we were on our way and to be ready for us. Turns out Lillith wasn't at Drina's. She and Drina walked to the sub shop to have a sandwich. FINE. We'll pick you up there. And we continued our drive.

Three minutes later, Lillith calls back. Turns out she isn't at Drina's house AND she isn't at the sub shop. She is at the mall. Sorry, she lied.

So now, we have to go back from where we came and collect our lying, wayward daughter, who earlier in the day told me to fuck off. On the way to the mall, we discuss Lillith's punishment. He wants to take the phone and two days grounding. I insist on a week of both, pointing out that she has lied, taken off on the bus, defied her original restriction AND told me to fuck off. We agreed.

Now every 12 -18 hours she bitches about the total unfairness of both being grounded and losing her phone. She doesn't mind being grounded, but she CAN'T be grounded tomorrow because she made plans. She is going to the mall to buy her boyfriend a Christmas present and then having a sleep over with Drina. And, as always, it is her last chance to do so before.. Mars explodes, I guess. She has to have her phone because text messaging is her main method of communicating with her boyfriend. It is endless and circular. And frankly proof that she just wants her own way.

When these arguments fall on deaf ears I get the follow up.

The harangue about I really don't know anything about her. How she tries so hard, but can't please me ever. I have never really loved her. How I am tuning her out. I have no respect for her (I know.. she told me to fuck off.. this seems a bit pot-calling-kettle-black to me too). That Aunt Maggie was right about me! (whatever this means) No one likes me and because of that I don't know the pressures of being popular. (Yeah, kid, nothing wins me over more than the "You are just a loser anyway" argument)

The worst? She is grounded until Thursday. It is going to be a really long week.

How do they know?

All across the City of Chicago you see them. You see it in the suburban girls too.

The uniform.

It started with Aunt Maggie asking the question, "What's the deal with the side ponytail?" And there it was. The ponytail high and off to the side, but just a bit. Next is the head band or a piece of pre-wrap tied around their head. (naturally in a coordinating color)

All the girls in middle school and junior high wear them. Well, at the least the athletic girls and my girls are, as are most of their friends. So I see the look alot.

And then I noticed the other things Imelda in particular wanted. Flannel plaid pajama pants in the school colors. A hoodie from Under Armor. A North Face fleece jacket. Tees and jeans from Abercrombie, Victoria's Secret underwear from the Pink Collection (virtually anything from the Pink Collection really), sweat pants with a word on the ass. And then there are the shoes.

Birkenstocks. as if it were still the 70s and my girls ate granola!!! Yet they HAD to have them.

and UGG boots. God, they are ugly. But bit by bit the other girls at school have been acquiring them.

Yesterday we headed off to a basketball tournament. Girls from all over the city were there. What were they wearing? The same uniform. Unbelievable. (By the way we won our games so now we play NEXT weekend too, yeah us!)

After the game we stopped at the house of some friends. While we, grownups, know each other the kids had never met. As Imelda and Lillith were surrounded by a pack of girls with side ponytails and Ugg boots and Abercrombie jeans and North Face jackets. And these girls don't even go to Catholic school!

Somehow, this has become their uniform. I don't see it on tv. I don't see it in magazines. I don't see it in movies. But the network of sporty teens has taken over and created their own unique style.

Weird

Have you noticed?

everytime teens make plans there are 20 different changes before anything is finalized?

Just wondering...

Summer Fun

Yes, it seems to be missing sound. Clearly I screwed something up. But it is the happiest I have seen them together this summer so I had to record it!

Thirteen

NO, not that movie... I won't link it because it depresses me to think about.

This is a tale of two teenage girls.

One was 13 in 1979 and is shown here. Why do I look 28? Did I ever have a youth? Yeah I must have.. and apparently I squandered it.

Blech. Whatever.

This girl has done it right. She looks cute, happy, athletic and popular.


She could improve her grades, but I can help her with that. Over all I would rather be her.


Happy Birthday, my darling 13 year old girl, MonAnge!


(in case you are wondering.. and I am sure none of you are, I have decided to substitute MonAnge for The Angel... I think it flows better... what do you think?)

Oh and her horoscope for today, via the Chicago Tribune:

Today's Birthday (Jan. 23). A partnership developed this year brings you security. You'll also make new friends and do things you've never done before. Try not to spend too much on toys.

**Update**

I should have thought of this before... but I just double checked on IMDb to see who MonAnge shares a birthday with to see if this gives me any insight into her and her personality... it is an interesting mix:

Tiffani Thiessen (34)
Norah O'Donnell (34)
Mariska Hargitay (44)
Gail O'Grady (45)
Princess Caroline of Monaco (51)
Richard Dean Anderson (58)
Rutger Hauer (64)
Chita Rivera (75)
Jeanne Moreau (80)

Nope... it isn't really helping me much.